On self-promotion and risk

I’m not completely sure why ordering my first batch of 250 promo postcards was such a scary thing. After creating the initial design, I forced myself to “sleep on it” night after night, until I was absolutely positive. In that time I changed the background color three times and the size twice, but the whole time I stood by the image I wanted to use (Julio and Brando, from my series This Family/Esta Familia). Today I finally uploaded my files and paid for the cards and envelopes. It feels good to check off my to-do list this first step I’ve made towards self-promotion (other than participating in portfolio reviews, launching a website, submitting to contests, etc. I know they’re all technically “business decisions”, but this one felt like the first really obvious one).

I think part of the fear about ordering was my tendency towards perfection and dwelling on small details. I’ve learned that when it comes to major life-changing decisions, I seem to make them within a matter of minutes. But I often over-think the smaller details, most which can be changed much more easily. I have a whole day to approve the postcard layout for example, and if I come to really dislike them, I can always order new ones.

This brings me to what is probably mostly at stake here – money. I saved up for weeks so I could order these first 250. I can’t afford to order another bunch with a different image for at least a few months. While they do represent an important step for my new career and will be so helpful to me as my mailing list grows every day, it was an intimidating spend. I might even have ordered less if the printing company I wanted to use offered a smaller run.

This may be my first real example of how being an emerging photographer, and not actually making a living off my own work yet, affects my ability to promote myself the way I want to.

But I have been taught to “trust the process”, to go for it and take the risks, and to let my images decide what they need from me, rather than the other way around (thanks especially to Michael Hintlian and others). These apparently have been invaluable lessons not only in my shooting and editing process, but my business decisions as well. Spending large amounts of money may always seem like more of a risk than shooting images, but it’s a different kind of risk. I hope that going forward in my career I’ll always prioritize what’s important, and that’s definitely my work, first and foremost. Maybe writing this down will help me out if I ever need a reminder.